At soldiers’ graves, the rows keep growing: Remembrance Day is shaped by new loss

This year's Remembrance Day, Yom Hazikaron, in Israel is profoundly shaped by the ongoing conflict and its relentless toll. For families like Varda Morell, whose son Maoz was killed in Gaza in February 2024, the visit to the Mount Herzl military cemetery is a stark reminder of the continuous loss. The once-sparse section where her son is buried is now completely full, with "another row and another row and another row" of fresh graves.

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Each time we’ve come to visit his grave, there’s another row and another row and another row.

The official ceremonies, meant to honor the fallen, have been disrupted for six consecutive years, a trend that began with the pandemic and has since been exacerbated by political instability, wildfires, and the current wartime reality. This year, the government reports 170 soldiers and security personnel killed since the last Remembrance Day. For bereaved families, the constant stream of "cleared for publication" announcements brings the pain of new losses, making the day less about historical remembrance and more about present grief.

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My heart feels sick just thinking about it.

This evolving landscape has led many families to disengage from official commemorations. Over 150 families signed a letter urging lawmakers not to use military cemeteries as a "political platform." For some, like Orit Shimon, whose son Dotan was killed in Gaza, the traditional rituals have become too painful. While she once found solace in visiting her son's grave and watching remembrance programs, the loss of her son has made such activities unbearable. Her connection now lies in photos and videos, a testament to how grief reshapes personal traditions and the very meaning of remembrance in a nation constantly at war.

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The club that no one wants to be a part of.