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🇰🇷 South Korea /Culture & Society

Children's Book Teaches How to Set Personal Boundaries and Communicate Feelings

From Hankyoreh · () Korean

Translated from Korean, summarized and contextualized by DistantNews.

At a glance

In-depth Sources not specified Context piece
  • A book titled "No, I Clearly Like It!" teaches children how to understand and communicate their personal boundaries and feelings.
  • It uses the metaphor of an invisible "bubble" to represent personal space and explains that animals also defend their boundaries, like skunks or hedgehogs.
  • The book emphasizes the importance of practicing emotional awareness and seeking consent, especially in an era where personal information is easily shared online.

The book "No, I Clearly Like It!" by Filippiner Van der Hulst and Karin Middelburg, with illustrations by Agnes Lonstra, offers a guide for children on understanding and asserting their personal boundaries. It introduces the concept of a "psychological boundary" or "personal space" using the metaphor of an invisible "bubble" that surrounds every living being. When this bubble is breached, individuals, like animals that react defensively with skunk spray, snorting, or bristling quills, feel uncomfortable.

Everyone has their own space. It's like an invisible bubble, and when someone else enters it, it feels uncomfortable.

Explaining the concept of personal space

The book highlights that personal boundaries differ among individuals and require learning and practice. It aims to teach children how to recognize their own boundaries and how to ask for consent from others. The authors encourage practicing emotional honesty, even when children might hide their feelings to avoid disappointing friends or parents. The book suggests exercises like touching various objects to articulate feelings about them, acknowledging that even positive feelings can change depending on the situation.

The book emphasizes that personal boundaries differ among individuals and require learning and practice.

Highlighting the need for education on boundaries

A key message is that the word "no" is not a rejection but a way to communicate one's limits. The book also addresses contemporary issues, such as the online sharing of personal photos and videos without consent. It emphasizes bodily autonomy, stating that "your body is yours, and you must give permission for anyone to touch it." Children are advised to firmly refuse if someone tries to post their photos or videos online without permission, even if it seems funny at the time. The advice to consider future feelings – "what seems fun now may feel completely different later" – is also relevant for parents posting content of their children online.

'No' is not a word that pushes friends away, but a word that communicates my boundaries.

Reinterpreting the meaning of 'no'
DistantNews Editorial

Originally published by Hankyoreh in Korean. Translated, summarized, and contextualized by our editorial team with added local perspective. Read our editorial standards.

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