‘If I Had Known… I Wouldn’t Have Divorced’: 40-Somethings Who Regret Their Breakups

Some individuals who divorced in their 40s believed they were starting a new chapter, only to find themselves looking back with regret, feeling they lost more than they gained. Le Figaro's "Si j’avais su" series collects these intimate testimonies, shedding light on the complexity of life choices and their unexpected consequences.

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If I had known... I wouldn't have divorced.

Fabien, Marion, and Carole are among those who divorced in their 40s, convinced it was the most rational decision. However, they later discovered that some experiences cannot be easily replaced. Fabien, a Parisian dentist, reflects on his divorce at 44 after sixteen years of marriage. He initially believed the separation was the result of long introspection, but now realizes he was blinded by resentment.

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I long believed that our divorce was the result of long introspection.

"Our couple had been struggling for a while, our three children were teenagers, and we argued a lot about them. We no longer had much of a sex life either, well, nothing extraordinary, in retrospect," Fabien explains. He admits that accumulated tensions and frustrations led him to believe he was being lucid when he was actually consumed by bitterness.

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Our couple had been struggling for a while, our three children were teenagers, and we argued a lot about them.

The article questions whether people in their 40s tend to harbor a false sense of control. Having navigated the challenges of early childhood and developed a taste for finer things, they might confuse experience with foresight. Fabien, who prepared for his divorce like a high-level athlete, now questions this assumption. His ex-wife did not initially want the separation, adding another layer to his complex decision-making process.

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We no longer had much of a sex life either, well, nothing extraordinary, in retrospect.