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Michael Owen says he does not tell his children he loves them. How serious is that?

From BBC News · () English

Translated from English and summarized by DistantNews. Read the original for the full story.

At a glance

In-depth Named sources Context piece
  • Former England striker Michael Owen said he would like to be softer but still does not tell his children that he loves them.
  • Parents and parenting experts debated whether actions can communicate love as effectively as words, with culture, gender, class and generations shaping family habits.
  • Some parents criticized Owen's view, while others said their fathers rarely used the words but made their love clear through their actions.

Michael Owen's admission that he does not tell his children he loves them has opened a wider argument about what fathers say, what they do and what children need to hear.

It's not words or actions - they shouldn't compete against each other, they should complement each other.

· Aaron DaleDale argued that spoken affection and caring behavior should work together in parenting.

Aaron Dale, host of the Raisingboys2men podcast and author of a parenting book, said words and actions should not compete. "It's not words or actions - they shouldn't compete against each other, they should complement each other," he said. Words deliver the message, he argued, while actions provide the evidence.

Dale said his own father often told him "I love you" after letting him down, which weakened the meaning of the phrase. Other parents took the opposite view. One father of a seven-year-old girl described Owen's comments as "awful" and said parents should tell their children they love them whether they are behaving well or badly. Another parent urged mothers and fathers to say it every day, even if it annoys their children.

You should always tell your children you love them no matter what, when they're bad, when they're good.

· Unnamed fatherA parent criticized Owen's reluctance to say the words to his children.

Owen's affection for his family is not in doubt to outside observers. A trailer for his new show, Meet the Owens, depicts what appears to be a happy home life. In 2024, he spoke emotionally about his son James's sight loss, saying, "If I could give him my eyes... I would."

If I could give him my eyes... I would.

· Michael OwenOwen spoke in 2024 about his son James's sight loss.

Asked why he does not say the words more freely, Owen said he would like to be "a little bit soft". "I'm definitely getting softer," he said, "but still not soft enough to say anything like that." Dale and Dr Britto linked that attitude to culture, class, gender and generational expectations. In some families, Dr Britto said, questions such as "Have you eaten?" express love instead. She said Nigerian parents do not always say "I love you", but that she still felt loved. The debate therefore extends beyond masculinity, to the many ways families express care.

I'm definitely getting softer, but still not soft enough to say anything like that.

· Michael OwenOwen explained why he still does not freely tell his children that he loves them.
About this summary

Originally published by BBC News in English. Translated, summarized, and contextualized automatically by DistantNews, with a note on how the source frames the story. Not individually reviewed before publishing. How this works.

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