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Psychologist: Time Alone Doesn't Heal Emotional Wounds
🇦🇷 Argentina /Culture & Society

Psychologist: Time Alone Doesn't Heal Emotional Wounds

From La Nación · () Spanish

Translated from Spanish, summarized and contextualized by DistantNews.

At a glance

In-depth Sources not specified Context piece
  • Psychologist Bernardo Stamateas explains that time does not automatically heal emotional wounds.
  • Past traumas can continue to cause present-day pain and affect emotional responses through a process called "transference."
  • Stamateas advises identifying triggers and asking reflective questions to begin healing emotional wounds from the past.

Psychologist Bernardo Stamateas challenges the common notion that time heals all wounds, stating, "The passage of years does not function as a magical factor for healing." He explains that emotional wounds often defy the passage of time; traumatic events from five, ten, or even thirty years ago can continue to inflict pain and influence our emotional state in the present.

The passage of years does not function as a magical factor for healing.

— Bernardo StamateasThe psychologist introduces the idea that time alone does not resolve emotional pain.

This phenomenon, known in psychology as "transference," involves re-experiencing and repeating old wounds within current situations. Stamateas uses the example of feeling anxious when a message isn't answered, suggesting the emotion stems from a past wound being activated. He notes that disproportionate reactions, like exploding when not greeted, often arise because an individual is reacting to their "wound of history" rather than the present moment. This past hurt acts as a filter, shaping how one interprets current events.

Is this reaction normal, or is it exaggerated because I am reacting to a wound?

— Bernardo StamateasStamateas suggests this self-reflective question as a starting point for understanding emotional responses.

Stamateas identifies several common emotional wounds. Feeling invisible or unconsidered in the past can lead to a present-day fear of abandonment and emotional dependency, manifesting as anxiety when someone leaves or doesn't respond. Constant criticism, humiliation, or being unfairly blamed in childhood can foster chronic insecurity, social shame, and a persistent need to please others. Experiences like theft, abuse, or violence leave deep "trauma marks," while infidelity shatters trust, often experienced as a traumatic event that destroys relationships built over years in mere minutes.

Why does this hurt me?; Why do I feel anxious?, Why do I have fear?, Why do I get angry?

— Bernardo StamateasThe psychologist lists key questions individuals should ask themselves to begin the healing process.

To begin healing these past wounds, Stamateas recommends identifying what triggers present reactions and questioning their proportionality. "Is this reaction normal, or is it exaggerated because I am reacting to a wound?" he suggests asking. Reflective questions such as "Why does this hurt me?" "Why do I feel anxious?" "Why am I afraid?" or "Why am I angry?" are crucial steps. Stamateas emphasizes that healing requires introspection and allowing time for self-discovery, urging individuals to "look inward" to understand and process their emotional pain.

look inward

— Bernardo StamateasStamateas stresses the importance of introspection for emotional healing.
DistantNews Editorial

Originally published by La Nación in Spanish. Translated, summarized, and contextualized by our editorial team with added local perspective. Read our editorial standards.

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