In Parenting, 'We Have Lost a Form of Ritual and With It, a Status'

In her latest work, "Le théorème du flamant rose," French archaeologist Jennifer Kerner turns her scholarly gaze from funerary rites to the complexities of modern birth and parenting. Published by Gallimard, this essay delves into the personal struggles Kerner experienced during her own pregnancy and postpartum period, using these intimate reflections as a springboard to question the evolving landscape of family life. She posits that in our contemporary pursuit of a certain ideal of parenting, we have lost a vital sense of ritual, and with it, a traditional status that once defined roles within the family.

Kerner's research, which has previously explored funerary practices across diverse cultures, now focuses on the rituals surrounding birth and early childhood. She observes a trend towards what she terms "ultra-feminized" parenting, raising critical questions about the role and perceived importance of fathers in this dynamic. Her work suggests that the shift in focus and the emphasis on the mother's experience may inadvertently diminish the father's sense of belonging and status within the family unit, a phenomenon she finds concerning.

From the perspective of Le Temps, Kerner's essay is particularly relevant as it touches upon a societal shift that many families are navigating. While international discourse often focuses on gender equality and shared parental responsibilities, Kerner introduces a nuanced counterpoint, exploring the potential downsides of this evolution. Her archaeological lens, applied to the intimate sphere of the family, offers a unique and thought-provoking analysis of how societal changes impact fundamental human experiences and structures.

This exploration is not merely an academic exercise; it is deeply rooted in lived experience. Kerner's willingness to share her personal journey alongside her scholarly insights makes the essay accessible and relatable. It invites readers, particularly parents and those contemplating parenthood, to reflect on the rituals, roles, and statuses within their own families, prompting a broader conversation about what might have been lost in the transition to modern parenting paradigms.

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In parenting, we have lost a form of ritual, and with it, a status.