Parenting column: 'So much time!' - A father's reflection on life without children

A father shares his reflections on a week spent without his children, a period he describes as having "sturmfrei" – a German term for being home alone, typically when parents are away. The experience left him pondering a question often posed to those without children: "What do you do with all that time?"

He contrasts the newfound leisure with the relentless pace of life as a parent. Days felt longer, even with later wake-up times. There was more capacity for work, and significantly less pressure. Evenings allowed for later bedtimes without the usual fatigue, and dining out felt comparatively inexpensive. This rediscovered sense of time, he notes, is not forgotten, nor is the ability to "waste" it – a skill he humorously suggests would have made him a top player in online soccer simulation games if he had more time for them.

Despite relishing this forgotten feeling of freedom, he admits to missing his children intensely from the very first second. He found himself reminiscing over vacation photos from 2015, prompted by his phone's memories feature, appreciating the time available to indulge in such reflections.

His wife commented on the unusual experience of not getting out of bed before 9 a.m., to which he countered, questioning whether it's normal to always have to get up before 7 a.m. and constantly feel obligated. This thought coincided with an article on the Süddeutsche Zeitung's homepage asking, "How average are you?" The test revealed his household of five belongs to a minority of 4 percent of Germans, far from average. He muses that perhaps being "normal" isn't so desirable in a country where "madness" increasingly becomes the norm.

The week culminated in a rare night out, dancing until dawn to a mix of current pop music infused with techno beats – the kind of music his children listen to. This shared enjoyment of music, coupled with the realization that such outings would soon cease again, underscored the paradoxical wonder of parenthood: a profound love for children that makes even the freedom from them feel incomplete, while simultaneously cherishing the moments of respite.