“Make babies,” said Els van Doesburg. Was the remark misplaced, or are we too negative about parenthood?

“Don’t hesitate, people: make babies! As many as you can!” Antwerp Mayor Els van Doesburg told HUMO, saying she ends her speeches with that appeal. The remark has prompted strong reactions and renewed debate over how public figures talk about parenthood.

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Don’t hesitate, people: make babies! As many as you can!

Van Doesburg, who became a mother 15 months ago, says social media can make motherhood look like a competition over who has the hardest time. She argues that this should not become the universal image of being a mother. “Of course it is intense. But that does not outweigh how fantastic it feels,” she said, adding that her position gives her the ability to make changes. “But that is exactly the point: if I do not do it, who will?”

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Of course it is intense. But that does not outweigh how fantastic it feels.

Friturist Dorien Nuyts criticized the mayor on Instagram, calling her “privileged” and saying she cannot identify with other people’s circumstances. Nuyts argued that the mayor’s responsibility is to provide a safety net, while Antwerp has an “absurdly small” childcare supply.

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It is her responsibility to provide a safety net. There is an absurdly small supply in her city.

The subject has triggered strong reactions before. More than a decade ago, presenter Siska Schoeters faced intense criticism after describing her children as “little fuckers,” while making the opposite point: people should also be willing to say that parenthood is not always easy. Actress and writer Leen Dendievel, who describes herself as child-free, said extreme statements often produce extreme responses. UGent pedagogy professor Jochen Devlieghere said the sensitivity also reflects unequal conditions for raising children. Finances, whether someone raises children alone, the number of children, access to support and even whether a baby sleeps through the night can all shape the experience.

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Those sensitivities are understandable. In this case, I think it is mainly about the fact that the conditions and situations in which parents have to raise children are very unequally distributed.