Sharing the 'mental load' key to gender-equal families, workshop finds

A recent "Gender-Equal Family Play Workshop" held in Jeju, South Korea, brought together seven families to explore the nuances of creating equitable households. The workshop, supported by the Jeju Provincial Government's "2026 Gender Equality Movement Support Project," revealed that a significant barrier to gender equality lies not just in the division of physical chores, but in the "invisible mental labor" of planning and managing daily life.

Data from the National Statistical Office's "2024 National Time Account Survey" indicates that women perform 73% of the nation's unpaid domestic labor, valued at 582.4 trillion won (approximately $420 billion USD). While men's participation in household tasks has increased compared to the past, a significant gap persists. This disparity is largely attributed to the continued overlooking of mental labor – the foresight, planning, and coordination required to run a household – which often falls disproportionately on women.

During the workshop, fathers expressed a desire to be "good fathers and husbands" but struggled to recall details like their children's classmates or teachers' names. Upon creating a checklist of 36 domestic and caregiving tasks, many fathers were surprised to realize how little they were involved in the "mental load" of managing the family's schedule, social relationships, and meal planning. They pledged to become more active in practical caregiving, such as taking children to the doctor or handling family event gifts.

The workshop also challenged the common notion that children helping their mothers with chores equates to gender equality. Instead, it emphasized shifting the focus from "helping Mom" to "taking care of my own life" as a step toward becoming independent individuals with rights and responsibilities. Participants identified "not fighting" and "more conversation" as key benefits of gender-equal families, suggesting that much of current family conflict stems from unacknowledged burdens and daily tensions. True gender equality, the workshop concluded, involves democratic relationships where all members are respected as equal subjects, free from age and gender stereotypes, fostering mutual appreciation and open communication.