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Child Psychologist: Parents Should Avoid Telling Children 'Stop Crying' or 'It's Nothing'
๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ท Croatia /Culture & Society

Child Psychologist: Parents Should Avoid Telling Children 'Stop Crying' or 'It's Nothing'

From Veฤernji List · (8h ago) Croatian

Translated from Croatian, summarized and contextualized by DistantNews.

TLDR

  • A child psychologist advises parents against telling children to suppress negative emotions, as this can hinder emotional resilience.
  • Phrases like "It's nothing" or "Stop crying," while well-intentioned, can make children feel their emotions are invalid.
  • Children need to learn to process difficult feelings like sadness and anger, rather than believing they must hide them.

In Croatia, parents often prioritize their children's happiness above all else, a sentiment echoed by the common phrase, "I just want my child to be happy." However, child psychologist Robyn Koslowitz warns that this well-meaning approach can inadvertently harm a child's emotional development. According to Koslowitz, happiness is not a constant state, and teaching children to avoid or suppress negative emotions like sadness, frustration, or anger can prevent them from developing crucial coping mechanisms.

I just want my child to be happy.

โ€” ParentsA common phrase parents use, which a child psychologist warns can be detrimental.

This perspective challenges the traditional Croatian emphasis on maintaining a cheerful facade, suggesting that allowing children to experience and express a full range of emotions is vital for building resilience. When children believe that negative feelings are wrong, they may hide them from parents, leading to isolation and difficulty in addressing serious issues like anxiety or peer problems.

Happiness is not a naturally permanent human state.

โ€” Robyn KoslowitzExplaining why the constant pursuit of happiness can be harmful to children.

The article highlights how common phrases used to comfort children, such as "It's nothing" or "Stop crying," can be interpreted by children as a message that their feelings are not important or acceptable. This is a critical insight for Croatian parents who may be accustomed to offering quick reassurances rather than allowing space for emotional processing.

It's nothing

โ€” ParentsAn example of a phrase parents use with good intentions that can cause harm.

Ultimately, the advice from Koslowitz, as reported by Veฤernji List, encourages a shift towards validating all emotions, even the uncomfortable ones. This approach aims to equip children with the tools to navigate life's inevitable challenges, fostering a healthier and more robust emotional foundation.

Stop crying

โ€” ParentsAn example of a phrase parents use with good intentions that can cause harm.
DistantNews Editorial

Originally published by Veฤernji List in Croatian. Translated, summarized, and contextualized by our editorial team with added local perspective. Read our editorial standards.