You Are Useless If You Don't Want to Reproduce: Stories of Women Who Chose Not to Have Children

In Slovakia, a growing number of women are openly discussing their decision to remain childfree, challenging deeply ingrained societal expectations that often equate womanhood with motherhood. The article highlights the personal journeys of women like Klára Fordová, who, from a young age, felt no desire to raise children, and Terézia Mlejová, a data analyst who, despite witnessing the joys of parenthood through her siblings, never felt the maternal urge.

“

It seemed to me that Barbie's life was over, from now on she would only have to take care of someone. And I didn't want to play that.

These women often face significant social pressure and judgment. Klára recounts a particularly harsh online comment calling her 'useless' for not planning to reproduce, a sentiment that, while once hurtful, she now views as a reflection of the commenter's own issues. Mária, another woman featured, consistently hears 'rational reasons' from her surroundings for why she should have children, yet lacks the internal drive, a feeling she has held since puberty.

“

Completely over the line was the remark when an older gentleman once wrote to me on Facebook that I was useless because I didn't plan to reproduce on this planet. He said I should go kill myself.

The article contextualizes these personal experiences within broader European trends. Recent surveys indicate a rise in the number of childless women across Europe, with statistics from the OECD showing an increase in nearly all monitored European states over the last two decades. While Slovakia currently has one of the lowest rates of childlessness among 49-year-old women (nearly 12%), the personal narratives underscore a shift in individual choices and a growing willingness to defy traditional roles.

“

I never felt the desire to have children, despite perceiving all the positives of parenthood thanks to my siblings. I see many examples of how beautiful life with children can be. But in my own setup, it changed nothing. I'm happy I can be an aunt.

Psychologist Renáta Kočišová explains that the desire for a child is influenced by a complex interplay of biological, social, and experiential factors. For these women, the absence of this desire is not a sudden development but a deeply felt personal truth. Their stories, as presented by SME, serve to normalize the choice of not having children, emphasizing that it is a valid and personal decision, free from societal obligation. This perspective is crucial in a society where traditional family structures are often still heavily emphasized.

“

It is completely okay for a woman not to have children – it is a free decision and it doesn't always have to be like that.