Sebastian Tigges: "I believe many parents separate too early"

Sebastian Tigges, a prominent German influencer known as "Walking Dad," is advocating for a more engaged approach to fatherhood, particularly focusing on active co-parenting after relationship breakdowns. Tigges, who left his career as a lawyer specializing in insolvency law to become a more present father to his two children, now shares his insights on "mental load" and "passive fatherhood" through his social media and a column in "Stern" magazine.

Tigges publicly separated from his partner, model Marie Nasemann, last year, stating the decision was "out of love for our children, who deserve parents who can treat each other kindly." He has since been open about his experiences as a single dad and co-parent, noting that many mothers have reported feeling significantly better after separating from their partners, often due to a reduced mental load.

He explains that this reduction in mental load isn't necessarily because fathers suddenly take on more of the cognitive caregiving tasks, but rather because the burden of managing another adult's needs and expectations is removed. This includes managing everyday questions like "Have you seen my keys?" or "Do we have a gift for my mother?"

Tigges champions active fatherhood and partnership, emphasizing that physical and mental presence, coupled with a sense of responsibility, is the most crucial aspect of parenting. He observes that men often only confront these issues after a relationship ends. "If you want to live 50:50 with your children after separation, you have to coordinate even better than during the partnership. And the conflicts remain the same. Why wait so long until you are forced to divide everything concretely?"

While his views on equal parenting and clear task distribution resonate with many, they also provoke strong reactions. Some critics argue that his experiences, stemming from a seemingly more privileged background, do not reflect typical family dynamics. Despite facing criticism, Tigges continues to share his perspective, encouraging parents to actively engage in their children's lives and to approach separation with a focus on constructive co-parenting.